-The first thing you receive in your mailbox is a card from the postal service that contains the heading "Rural Delivery".
-You're heading out to your first dinner out "in town" (trying to make it there before they close at 9 PM!), when you pass by a building with a parking lot full of cars and wonder, wow? what's going on *there* on a Wednesday night? And then you realize, it's a church.
-When passing by said church, you and your spouse speculate on what these good townspeople would think of you should the postman ever reveal to them the contents of your mail. (I read it for the articles, really!)
-At your big dinner out "in town", country songs are in regular rotation in the background music.
-After a big snow (like the one we had last night) you feel absolutely trapped in your own home until you are able to locate someone who is willing to come plow your 400 ft sloping driveway, because your compact car will never make it back up the hill should you leave the house with the driveway unplowed.
-You call to order a pizza from only pizza place in town, and the phone number is 555-8181. 10 minutes later, you have no heat or hot water and need to call the local repairman. His number is 555-8282.
-The local paper (delivered free to all residents on Fridays) contains full pages listing activities for senior citizens, numerous articles on church-related activities in the various towns (e.g. "Chicken Supper at Methodist Church"), an ad for a Christian summer camp, and...get ready for it...I am NOT making this up...a Jazzercise ad.
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6 comments:
Wonder what the good townspeople would think of your box marked “goodies”… :D
When I was a journalism major in college, I worked for our local town's paper covering exactly the activities you noted.
“Mr. Herman Greer, age 78, reports the appearance of new sun spots on his arms…” Ok, not really, but pretty darn close.
Oooo, Jazzercize! You gotta join! I must admit, *ahem*, that I , *ahem*, once took a Jazzercize class. I know, I know, but I've been following a 12-step program ever since to help me get over it.
Don't forget
-Within the first week you actually contemplate purchasing a small pickup truck for use on your new land.
-Your mail delivery person drives her own vehicle, and it's not a mail truck.
-Most of the restaurants are closed on Sundays and the rest are patronized by folks still dressed up from "service."
-You realize you are actually about two degrees of separation from everyone in town.
-Your electricity goes out fairly regulalry and your neighbor explains, "Yeah, that's the problem with the co-op, they just can't keep up."
Glad you're enjoying the kawntree.
MB--I definitely could have included your first point on my list! I barely made it up the icy driveway in my little compact car the day we moved in!
Okay and I have a few more
- You have no choice on local phone service, cable service or high-speed interenet service, due to the local monopoly.
- Your neighbors tell you they moved to the neighborhood 'cuz they couldn't stand living in a state with the word NORTH in it anymore (no joking, two of them told us that).
- The unsightly blue tarp-covered cages in the backyard are where your neighbors keep their hunting dogs.
- You have an actual hunting blind and archery course on your property.
Mercedes, I've already had to warn a couple people (friends/family, not new neighbors!) that they will NOT be allowed to hunt on my property!
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