Milk Pistols

This one goes out to my girl MB:



If you can't understand the lyrics, go to http://eclectech.co.uk/milkpistols.php and play the video there--it's subtitled!

Count your blessings

When we started thinking about trying to conceive last year, I stumbled across a pregnancy website and found myself reading and posting to messageboards talking to other women trying to conceive. When I got pregnant, I joined my "Due Date Club" messageboard on the site--a place for women due in February 2008 to post questions and concerns and discuss the joys of (and the not-so-fun stuff about!) pregnancy. We have women from all over the country, and many from around the world. Single moms, first-time moms, veteran moms. Everybody had a unique situation, but we were brought together by the unique experience of pregnancy and motherhood

Over the past year the women on the board have gotten to know each other, and have supported each other through difficult pregnancy symptoms, scary prenatal testing, amusing bodily emissions issues, childbirth, and the amazing transformation into mothers of beautiful babies.

The internet is an interesting place. I've perused other messageboards where people get clique-y, nasty, judgemental, and argumentative. But, my messageboard friends always agreed that the Feb '08 board was special in that we didn't see much of the negative. Despite differing backgrounds and views, we found ourselves in an incredibly supportive environment, even if it was filled with people we only knew through keystrokes and photographs.

One of the women on my board found out during her pregnancy that her baby boy, Lincoln, would be born with Down Syndrome. It was her first pregnancy, and she and her husband were beyond excited to meet the little boy they called their "precious gift" before he was even born. She went through a lot of testing during her pregnancy that involved driving to a faraway hospital and spending weeks at a time away from home. When Lincoln was born, she posted pictures of her beautiful baby boy and we all admired her for her strength and joy in the face of difficulty.

Last week, Lincoln got sick and ended up in the hospital. His situation was critical, and the doctors could not figure out what was causing his decline. His mom posted updates to the board regularly and she got an outpouring of support. We all agreed that the problems we were used to posting about on the board--leaky diapers, babies not sleeping through the night, holding on to those extra pregnancy pounds--seemed silly and selfish when we knew of a mom who was by her baby's bedside in the NICU praying for him to get better.

Early yesterday morning, baby Lincoln passed away. He was only a few weeks older than Maia. I can't even begin to imagine what it must be like to lose a baby, and my heart breaks for her and her husband.

I am not the most patient Mom in the world, but the next time I get frustrated by a few minutes of crying, I hope to remind myself how lucky I am to have a beautiful, healthy baby, and that there are moms out there who would give anything to hear their babies' cries again but never will.

Mommy Meetups

Being a new mom and also new to our area, I've been thinking how it would be nice to get involved with a mom's group. But for some reason, it seems that 99% of the mom's groups out there are targeted at stay-at-home moms. Even the parent & child classes (like the mom & baby yoga class I've been going to during my maternity leave) all seem to be scheduled on weekdays, and are thereby geared towards SAHMs. Nothing against SAHMs--I'd love to be one if I could--but what about the rest of us? We may work during the week but that doesn't mean we aren't seeking out opportunities to meet other moms or to participate in parent/baby activities.

Today I was checking out the "Holistic Moms Network" (HMN) website. They have a chapter near me, and they meet in the evening. Sounds great! But honestly, I'm not sure I would fit in. I'm slowly trying to live "greener" and eliminate nasty chemicals from the food and products in our home--I mean, jeez, I've been to the newly-opened Whole Foods like 7 times in the past 2 weeks! (Ah, the joys of having a nearby Whole Foods, that's a topic for another day.) But, I have chosen to have my child vaccinated (the horror!), and while I haven't set any firm limits on how long I will breastfeed or co-sleep, I find breastfeeding 3-year olds a little creepy and I'm pretty sure Maia will be sleeping in her own room by the time she's 6 months old. I would also not be able to sit straight-faced through any meetings about optimizing one's aura. I'm not kidding, but the local HMN's next meeting topic is "Alkalize and Ph Balancing". I am not even sure what that's supposed to mean. It conjures up images of zit-cream commercials but I'm pretty sure I'm off-base there. So what do you think, should I check it out?

Maia was cranky when we tried taking pictures of her with Daddy's tattoos. We're going to try it again sometime.

I heard about this book called "Mommy Has A Tattoo". It's supposed to teach kids that tattoos aren't scary.


I would probably add a page that says "except for tattoos on people's *faces* (unless you're in an exotic country where it's a cultural thing, of course)".

not smarter than your average bear

Today I walked by a couple of guys fishing in a waterway near my house. Both of them were smoking. As I approached, one of the guys took the butt from his mouth and flicked it into the water. I hope he catches a huge fish and gets a nice big bite of butt. What an ass.

2 months old

Don't you just want to eat her up?

little yogi

I guess all that Mommy & Baby yoga is paying off...look at my little peanut doing Goddess Pose in her sleep!

an awkward teenage moment that wasn't mine

A little over a year ago we moved to our new house, which sits on several wooded acres. Imagine a 50-acre subdivision, where most of the homeowners have 1-to-2 acre plots around the outer edge of the 50 acres...well, we and our neighbors each own about half of the remaining interior portion of the property. We live on a hill, so when we go out back there's a trail that leads down onto our property. We have some walking trails and a lovely stream with a footbridge. Our property is not fenced, and it does butt up against the rear property lines of all the homes that sit on the edges.

What am I getting at here? Well, occasionally we will look out our back windows and see people walking through the woods...which means they're on our property. It's not so much that we care if someone walks through, except that sometimes they bring their dogs (and our dog is fairly territorial) and also if someone were to get hurt (by, say, falling off the footbridge into the rocky stream and splitting their head open), I'm guessing we would be liable.

So, today I was about to take Maia for a walk, and I was planning on taking the stroller out front onto the street. But then I noticed a red-cloaked figure down by the stream. So I popped the baby into my wrap carrier and went down the trail into the woods. From my window it had appeared that the person was near the stream, maybe bending down picking plants? However, I was not quite prepared for what I found when I got down there. I approached the footbridge and saw that the person was IN the stream. SITTING in the stream, facing away from me. Near the bridge was a backpack with some towels. I said "hi, can I help you?" and an awkward-looking, chubby teenage girl turned around looking a little startled. She got up and I took in what she was wearing--a red hooded sweatshirt on top, and on the bottom some very short plaid shorts and sneakers. Did I mention she had been sitting IN the water? It's warming up here but it's not THAT warm!! It was about 55 degrees here today and our stream is in the shade.

I felt bad for her immediately. I had caught her doing something rather strange and I'm sure she was embarrassed. I said "it's a little cold for that, isn't it? I just wanted to let you know that this is private property. It's just that if someone got hurt down here we could get in trouble." By this point she had already stood up and was walking toward her towels. Not wanting to humiliate her any further, I kept walking up the trail. By the time I looped back around she was on her way off the property.

I felt bad, like I should have told her it was OK to stay or something, but what I'm really dying to know is WHAT THE HELL WAS SHE DOING?!?

strategy for future misbehavior

When I was a kid and was acting up, my dad used to threaten to sell me to the gypsies (no offense to any of my gypsy readers). He would actually go so far as to pretend to call the gypsies on the phone and ask them to come pick me up. Now, having finally seen some real gypsies later in life on the streets of Paris, I know that they don't have phones, but hey, I was young and naive. If only my dad had known that the gypsies in Paris set out their crippled little kids on the streets--and are even known to throw babies at passerby just to get them to drop their purses! Then, maybe then, he would have thought twice about threatening to give them his only child.

J and I were talking about how today's kids don't really know who "the gypsies" are, so we will never be able to use the "sell you to the gypsies" strategy with Maia when she gets older. However, we have a new plan. We will threaten to sell her to "Good Ole Tom" for extra cash. I hear that cute white babies are at a 20-year high.

god forbid I should have to wash a dish

Why is it that every time I have guests over and am feeding them, they always ask why I'm not using paper plates? The last time this happened I said "well, I have these perfectly good plates right here" and the response I got was "but then you have to wash them". And that's why I have a dishwasher? I just don't understand this attitude. Sure, if I'm having a larger gathering paper plates are the way to go...but I didn't register for a set of 12 nice plates so that I could whip out the paper ones anytime I have one extra person at my dinner table.

Just a little something I wanted to vent about...

the spit-up chronicles

Last night we attempted to put the baby to bed a little earlier than usual. I nursed her in our bedroom, and after an hour she still wasn't asleep but our dinner was ready. Since she seemed to be pretty subdued at that point, we thought we'd try putting her down in her bassinet and seeing what would happen.

We went downstairs and started to eat dinner. No noise from the monitor. After about 15 minutes, we started to hear some fussing, which eventually turned into crying. We gave it a few minutes, then J went up to see what was up. Next thing I hear is J yelling "she puked in her eye!". I went up to investigate and walked in on a scene straight out of "The Exorcist" (minus the head spinning and the demonic possession, that is). Poor girl had blown chunks all over her bassinet. Maybe she wasn't happy with all that Easter chocolate I ate?

This morning she was still having some spit-up issues. Here's where I almost lost it: she'd fallen asleep in my arms so I set her down in her boppy pillow on the couch next to me, and started to "milk myself". (That's how our aunt's boyfriend refers to pumping breast milk. He's real sophisticated, that one). Of course, that's when Maia woke up and started to cry. So, there I am, left boob hanging out and attached to the electric pump, and I pick up the baby with my free hand and try to console her by putting her up to my shoulder and patting her. Next thing I know she's spitting up all over my shirt and on her own face. It took me a minute to find a free hand to clean up the mess. I guess she got angry that the machine was getting her milk. Wonder if she noticed that the machine does not spew the milk back at me?

on the road again...

Last weekend we had to drive 900 miles each way for a family funeral. The pediatrician advised against flying due to the lots-of-germs-in-an-enclosed-space factor, so we opted to drive.

Maia did really well on the trip, sleeping the majority of the time. We'd stop every few hours and I'd nurse her in the front seat and change her diaper in my lap. Of course we'd squeeze in a few cuddles but then it'd be time to strap her back into the carseat and get going.

On the return trip, we stopped at a rest area just a few hours from home. We strapped Maia into her seat, and she promptly started screaming. After a few good yowls, she finally quieted down, but the look on her face was so pathetic that I had to break out the camera:
I couldn't wait to get home and give her a million hugs and kisses.

what have I done to deserve this??

By some utter miracle of nature, I have been blessed with a very easy baby. Granted, she is barely 3 weeks old, so she really doesn't do a lot more than eat, sleep, and poop. But, she really doesn't cry much, she doesn't have her days and nights confused, and therefore I am much more well-rested than the typical new mom.

Right now Maia is actually taking a nap in her crib...and I didn't even have to nurse her to sleep. I seriously don't know what I have done in my life to deserve a baby that sleeps long enough for me to get important things done around the house--things like cutting my toenails and blogging.

nervous daddy

J takes the baby upstairs to change her. A few minutes later, he's calling my name with a bit of a frantic tone to his voice. I walk into the nursery. "She peed on me, and then she spit up, and HER BELLY BUTTON IS FALLING OFF!" As he says all of this, he begins to realize he's freaking out *just a little bit*. Granted, the umbilical stump was halfway off and looked really gross...thankfully at least one of us had read the books about these things and knew what to expect.

Today the baby went back to business as usual--greeting daddy with several loud farts in a row. That's one bodily function with which he's familiar enough to handle like a pro. Oh, and the stump finally did fall off on its own today...

Maia's first days

At first she was a little angry about being removed from her nice, comfy dwelling. She was probably also a little embarrassed about being caught with her conehead on.



Luckily, the conehead look disappeared pretty quickly.


Daddy was beaming with pride.


But even he couldn't rescue her from the dreaded first bath!


Ah, naptime at last.


Before we knew it, it was time to go home! Thanks to BBFK for the going-home outfit.

and.....

IT'S A GIRL!!!!

Miss Maia Ellin joined our family at 11:19 PM on Wednesday, February 20, 2008. She is healthy and we are all doing great. We just got home from the hospital yesterday. Here's what went down:

Tuesday night we went to the hospital for the scheduled induction. They were very busy so we just kind of hung out for a while. I had been having some contractions on and off but nothing too regular, and they were barely noticeable to me. Around 11 PM, they administered Cytotec, which is supposed to soften the cervix and can also possibly start contractions. Never mind that the FDA has never approved it for this use, but I digress... Tried to get some sleep.

Wednesday morning they checked me and found that I'd dilated a bit more--to about 3 cm. I was having contractions that I couldn't really feel. They decided to start pitocin. We called our doula, Julie, to come join us at the hospital. The first few hours on pitocin were pretty uneventful. The contractions were getting closer together and were pretty bearable. The biggest problem we were having was with the fetal heart monitor strapped to my belly: the baby's heart sounded great, but she was moving all over the place so we kept losing it and had to readjust the belt frequently. Not cool when you're trying to cope with contractions by using different positions. I rotated between sitting on the birth ball to getting on hands and knees, to standing up and holding onto J.

As the day went on, I lost track of time in terms of how far I progressed, etc. They didn't check me too often, which was nice. All I know is that things got steadily more painful and that I did start having thoughts along the lines of "why was it that I wanted to do this without pain meds?" But I didn't want to give up, and J was such an awesome partner that I just wanted to keep going. My water broke around 2 PM--while I was on my hands and knees on the bed! J was standing next to me and actually heard an audible "pop"! By late afternoon/early evening I think I had gotten to about 7 cm. Somewhere in there they put in an internal fetal monitor so that I could change positions more freely without worrying about losing track of the heartbeat. At that point I felt like it couldn't be much longer, and that's the thought that helped me keep going. Well, things didn't seem to speed up a whole lot, but by about 7 PM I was checked again and was told that I was at 9, almost there! I kept waiting for the urge to push to arrive, knowing that then we would be in the home stretch. But the only time I felt like my body wanted to push was during the contractions. Apparently that's not quite enough. Around 9 PM the other doctor came and checked me, and I was still at 9, but wasn't completely effaced.

Then came the reality check. The doctors told me that they thought the baby was lying transverse, which would explain why we had trouble keeping track of the heartbeat, and would also explain why I still wasn't 100% effaced despite being at 9 cm. They told me that a c-section was looking very likely. They offered to put in an epidural and give me a little time to see if that might help the baby move into the right position. I decided to go ahead and get the epi then--something I had really wanted to avoid but that was looking inevitable if I was likely to have to have surgery anyway.

Getting an epidural when you're having contractions that are 2 minutes apart is no fun, but the anesthesiologist was awesome and once the meds started working I was able to relax. About 40 minutes later I was checked again and nothing had changed, so we decided to go ahead with the surgery.

Before we knew it, our baby was delivered and I have to say I was very surprised and excited when they announced that it was a girl! She looked a little like a Klingon when she came out--her forehead was mashed into a cone shape because she was trying to come out forehead-first. We knew then that having the c-section was definitely the right decision since there would have been no easy way for her to make it out the way she was trying to go!

She was 7 lbs, 10 oz, and 21 inches long, and she is absolutely beautiful. Daddy and I are completely in love already.

Pictures to come soon!!

Got excited last night when I had a few solid hours of regular contractions, but sadly they disappeared while I slept.

Only 24 hours to get moving on my own--induction is scheduled for 7 PM Tuesday...

I see that I am obligated to post daily lest anyone should get the idea that this baby has finally decided to come out!

Today I thought I should treat myself to a relaxing pedicure. The last time I'd been in the salon was 3 weeks ago, when I told the staff that it would probably be my last pedicure for a while. Needless to say, they were a little surprised when I walked in today. Then, there was the joy of being able to respond "6 days ago" to the question "when are you due?".

I think I made the owners a little nervous--about every 15 minutes they looked over at me and said "Are you OK?!" I told them that while nothing would make me happier than to go into labor right then and there in the massaging pedicure chair, I was pretty sure they had nothing to worry about.

Last night we had pepperoni pizza for dinner and have been trying other "natural induction" methods at a rate that puts our honeymoon to shame. I started to get hopeful this morning when I had about 2 hours worth of regular contractions...but then they petered out and here I sit. I'm hoping it's a start though...

Still considering the castor oil method. Will see how I feel in the morning.

stork of the northeast?

I just spent 20 minutes staring at a gorgeous red-tailed hawk perched high in a tree in my backyard. I think he looked right at me once. I know we don't have storks up here, so, um, maybe this is the northern assistant of the stork? Just sayin'...

still cookin'...

So, went to the doctor this morning. Baby is doing fine, BUT...to my dismay they have scheduled me to go in Tuesday night for an induction. They were talking Sunday night, Monday night, but I said I wanted to wait as long as possible so they agreed to Tuesday night as long as I was willing to come in Monday for another non-stress test and amniotic fluid check.

So, please keep your fingers crossed that I go into labor on my own before then...I am trying all the tricks that I know of. I am even getting desperate enough that the castor oil may have to come into play over the weekend...